“Absence of Affirmation”
From Hans Finzel’s book “Top Ten Mistakes Leaders Make”, #3 is “The Absence of Affirmation”
The pink Energizer Bunny keeps showing up and going, and going, and going, and …. Unlike the bunny, people aren’t like that. The emotional batteries need to be charged often.
Affirmation is a huge emotional battery recharger. The thing about affirmation or compliments is that they dissolve. Phyllis Theroux said, “One of the commodities in life that most people can’t get enough of is compliments. The ego is never so intact that one can’t find a hole in which to plug a little praise. But, compliments by their very nature are highly biodegradable and tend to dissolve hours or days after we receive them – which is why we can always use another.”
The whole business of affirming those we live with and work with is simple like NIKE: JUST DO IT.
Recharging other’s emotional batteries is an important responsibility of a leader. So, how do we affirm and encourage others?
Listening. Just because we are leaders does not mean we are the prime talkers.
Empathizing. When others are happy, we affirm by stopping to share their joy. If there is deep tragedy, we affirm by stopping everything and sharing their pain.
Comforting. We affirm their value as a person when we take time to comfort them.
Encouraging. Let people know often that they are doing a good job. Look for the good and point it out. A good compliment is specific and sincere. The more specific and sincere it is, the greater its impact on the person receiving it.
Let me encourage you to be leaders in affirmation!
Dan Bickel
Wisconsin District Superintendent
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